What Not to Say to the One in Anger

Imam An-Nawawi states in his Al-Adhkar,

“Section: It is reported by An-Nahhas from Abi Bakr Muhammad ibn Abi Yahya – and he was one of the Fuqaha’ Al-Adbaa’ – that he said: ‘He considered it makruh (hated) for one to say to someone while full of rage (ghadab) ‘Remember (or mention) Allah’ ta’ala’, for it may be that his anger will lead him to  utter disbelief. And he said, ‘And just the same one should not say to such a person ‘Send blessings upon the Nabi (‘alayhis salam)’ for fear that he would enter kufr as well.”

In other words telling someone to “Fear Allah” or to “Mention Allah” while in a state of intense anger is disliked, for it may be that his anger will drive him to say something against Allah ta’ala or the Nabi (‘alayhis salaam). A man became enraged in the presence of the Prophet Muhammad and the Prophet Muhammad told him that he knew a sentence, that if he said it, his anger would dissipate. Then he said:

أعوذ بالله من الشيطان الرجيم

“A’uthu billahi minash-shayton Ar-Rajim” – I seek refuge with Allah from the rejected Satan”. ((Reported by Al-Bukhari & Muslim in their Sahihs))

Take note that the Nabi Muhammad ‘alayhis salam did not force him to say it. Also notice the teaching that took place in this incident. One could contest that the Nabi ‘alayhis salam is actually telling him to do such, however, not everyone who is angry is the sublime presence of the Prophet of Allah. Thus, it is necessary to be rational and be aware that telling someone in a fit of rage to Fear Allah etc. may cause more harm than benefit. Allah Knows Best the affairs of the believers!

The Prophet Muhammad ‘alayhis salam also said,

إن الشيطان خلق من نار وإنما تطفأ النار بالماء

“Verily Satan was created from fire, and verily fire is put out with water.” 

And in the Sunan of Abu Dawud is the saying of the Prophet Muhammad,

إن الغضب من الشيطان، وإن الشيطان خلق من النار، وإنما تطفأ النار بالماء، فإذا غضب أحدكم فليتوضأ

“Verily rage is from Shayton, and Shayton is created from fire, and verily water extiguishes fire, so when one of you becomes angry let him make Wudu’.” ((Sunan Abu Dawud ))

It is also reported in the Sahih of Imam Al-Bukhari that Abu Hurayrah was actually deceived by a Shayton and that he told him to recite Ayatul-Kursi and the Shayatin will depart.

5 Islamic Solutions to Anger Management:

1. Ta’wwuth - to seek refuge in Allah.
2. Wudu‘. The spiritual benefits of wudu’ are obvious. One starts with Allah’s name and ends with La ilaha illa Allah! How could it NOT cause anger to dissipate!
3. Another hadith mentions sitting for the one standing and laying down for the one sitting. In other words Relax!
4. Reciting Ayatul-Kursi or the Mu’awwithatayn (Surat An Nas and Falaq)

Also See: Anger and Rage: Subdue the Ego